“A man is shown in a dream only what is suggested by his own thoughts…”

–R. Samuel b. Nahmani

There’s a popular quote: “We do not see things as they are. We see things as we are.”— attributed to various sources, including the Talmud.  What Rabbi Nachmani really said in Talmud Tractate Berakhot (55b.) is above. But if what we see in our dreams is suggested by our thoughts, might not what we see, or choose not to see in our so called waking states also be influenced by what and who we are?

The famous image above shows the profile of an old woman, or a young woman, depending how you look at it. Which one do you see? Can you see both? How we look at things depends on our life history, our culture, and our deep  belief systems called mental models. And when we have a deeply seated mental model, we tend to see life through that lens.

Imagine you see a sign that says, “Fine for Parking”. If you saw the world as a warm friendly place, you might park there, thinking that it was very thoughtful for someone to mark that parking space for you. If you were a more fearful person, you might avoid parking there, lest you get a ticket! Our worldview influences what we see and the meaning we make from it.

So it goes. What we tend to see outside ourselves reflects what is inside ourselves. And mere data has little effect on our mental models- we see what we see, and we won’t let mere facts get in the way. So we love one candidate and despise another, and cannot understand how our neighbor can vote for the other side. Seeing may be believing, but more often believing is seeing. We tend not to see things the way they are- we see them as we are.

How can you look at something with fresh eyes today, and challenge your own assumptions?

Samuel ben Nahmani  was a rabbi of the Talmud who lived in Israel and Babylon from the beginning of the 3rd century until the beginning of the 4th century. 

Joe Laur is a father, husband, artist, builder, naturalist, consultant, and EcoKosher mashgiach. He lives with his wife Sara in western Massachusetts, where he serves as head groundskeeper and resident singer songwriter. Send him your favorite teaching quote for commentary. He can be reached at joe.laur@joelaur.com.